The Whipped Weasleys
by MooseBlanket
Summary: Disgusted by Bill and Fleur's over-the-top, lovey-dovey relationship, Fred, George and Ginny form a club for whipped Weasley's and make Bill its first member. It's not long, though, before the other Weasleys fall in love and are admitted one by one. Fred swears he'll never become one of them; however, will he be able to withstand true love?


**A/N: Hi guys! This is the first story I'm posting, so please give it a read and tell me what you think! It's mostly canon-compliant apart from the fact that Fred doesn't die - I JUST COULDN'T DO IT, OKAY! *sniff* I tried, but it made the whole thing kind of depressing and this is meant to be a pretty light-hearted fic. Reviews are lovely, and all feedback is more than welcome, including constructive criticism.**

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It all started in the Christmas holidays before Bill was due to marry Fleur. She'd shove colour tiles under his nose and demand his opinion, order him to start organising their guest list, or drag him off to look at bridesmaid dresses. He did everything she asked with a beaming smile on his face, looking at her like all his dreams had come true.

Fred, George, and Ginny were sitting at the dining table playing Exploding Snap, watching as Bill came to and fro carrying stacks of wedding invitations, colour samples, various bouquets, and seating plans.

"Mate, you are so whipped," said Fred as Bill entered the room for the fifth time, this time laden with different rolls of dress materials.

"It's disgusting, really," agreed George with a grimace. "Our brother has officially joined the ranks of sentimental saps."

Bill only grinned and clapped them both on the shoulder, telling them that one day they'd be the same.

Nothing more was said on the matter until Christmas day when Ginny came bursting into Fred and George's room, a huge grin on her face. "You will _never _guess what Ron's girlfriend has given him for Christmas!" she exclaimed, gleefully. "It's this massive gold necklace with the words _My Sweetheart_ written on it. I swear, it's the tackiest thing I've ever seen!" Fred and George laughed uproariously and Ginny joined them, perching on the edge of George's bed.

"Ron's right up there next to Bill with the lovey-dovey saps," grinned Fred.

"Yeah, the two of them should form a club," laughed George. He looked at Fred, and suddenly the pair were frowning in serious contemplation.

"We'd need a name," said Fred, thoughtfully. "The _Whipped Weasleys_?"

"How about the_ Lovesick Idiots_," said Ginny bitterly. What with her constant fighting with Dean and her brother's fiancée driving her up the wall, she wasn't feeling too romantically inclined.

George raised an eyebrow. "_Whipped Weasleys _it is." He grabbed a sheet of parchment and settled down to write.

_**Whipped Weasleys**_

_**Conditions of Membership:**_

_1. Candidate is an immediate offspring of Messr Arthur Septimus Weasley and Mme Molly Estrella Weasley née Prewitt (i.e. Messrs William Arthur Weasley, Charles Mortimer Weasley, Percy Ignatius Weasley (not currently eligible on account of being a gigantic prat), Frederick Gideon Weasley, George Fabian Weasley, Ronald Bilius Weasley, or Mme Ginevra Molly Weasley) _

_2. Candidate is in a romantic relationship_

_3. Candidate has expressed love for relevant significant other through one (1) or multiple act(s) of sacrifice and/or over-the-top romantic gestures, i.e. the candidate is, in the vernacular, "whipped". Exceptions may apply; party officials to use discretion when admitting members._

_**Party Officials:**_

_Messr George Fabian Weasley, founder, chairman_

_Messr Frederick Gideon Weasley, co-founder, co-chairman_

_Mme Ginevra Molly Weasley, co-founder, vice chairman_

_**Rules of Conduct:**_

_1. Members can only be appointed by the chairman._

_2. Existence of club is to remain secret among non-members and their significant others._

_3. Consensus among party officials must be reached before any member can be admitted._

George signed his name with a flourish, then handed it to Fred and Ginny to sign.

"Excellent," said Fred with a gleam in his eye. "Now, Bill's a member obviously; the question is whether Ron should be or not."

"Nah," said George. "I doubt he loves this Lavender Brown girl, any idiot can see that he has a thing for Hermione."

Fred nodded thoughtfully. "What do you think, Ginny? You're the one who's seen them in action."

Ginny made a face. "Don't remind me." She hesitated. "They snog a lot. Like, all the time. I mean, it's disgusting the way they suck face. But…" She frowned. "I don't know that they have a whole lot else going on. I mean, the club should be for those seriously, completely, vomit-inducingly in love. And I've never seen Ron look at Lavender with a soppy grin the way Bill does when he looks at Fleur. Thank Merlin." She shuddered.

Fred grinned. "True. Plus, Ron hasn't really done much except receive a stupid necklace. If we ever see him wear it in public though…"

"… then he'll definitely have earned his rightful place among the _Whipped Weasleys_," finished George, solemnly.

The three of them ambushed Bill that evening, quietly took him to one side, and explained that he had the privilege of being the first and only member of the prestigious _Whipped Weasleys _club.

Bill looked confused at first, but then grinned and told them he was honoured.

A few months later Ginny began dating Harry and was considered for membership, but it wasn't long before Harry called it off. That was it for the club for a long time. The war came and went, and it was only in the sudden blossoming of romance following the long period of darkness that George dusted off the parchment once more and several additions were made.

The first was Ginny after she was seen sitting next to Harry, his arm around her and his face happy and relaxed for the first time in years. It was decided that Ginny qualified immediately for the club for waiting all these years and putting up with all the drama and danger and general tension and paranoia that had surrounded Harry for so long. Likewise Ron, once he'd finally admitted his feelings for Hermione, was granted membership instantly, because "Merlin knows it took them long enough," said Fred, and one look at Ron was enough to see that he was completely and utterly head over heels.

Percy too, having been embraced back into the family, admitted that he had recently started dating a woman with whom he worked. Nothing more was said on the matter until one evening over dinner, when Percy informed them that Audrey's sister was in town, and he'd therefore be taking the next couple days off work. Shocked silence met this announcement, and Ginny even gave a little scream at the thought that Percy would ever voluntarily miss work. She ran out of the room at once, Fred and George close behind her, and Percy was admitted into the club on the spot.

Things soon quietened down after that, and it was busy as usual for the _Whipped Weasleys_, although the vice-chairman was frequently absent, as she was often "_too busy sucking face with the Boy Wonder_," wrote Fred in the club's minutes for that week. "_Also of note is the unexplained absence of Co-Chairman George Fabian Weasley._" Said co-chairman appeared a few minutes later, panting, and wearing a big smile.

"Apologies for my tardiness, I was unavoidably detained."

"_6:08 pm. Vice-Chairman George Fabian Weasley deigns to appear, eight minutes late and with a stupid look on his face. Chairman Frederick Gideon Weasley awaits an explanation with bated breath,_" wrote Fred.

"Oi, since when was I demoted? We're co-chairmen!"

"Since you decided that your commitment to this sacred cause is secondary to any other concerns you may or may not have. What were you doing, anyway?"

George grinned. "I have a date with Angelina this Friday."

Fred froze for a moment, then resumed writing. '"_6:10 pm. Club receptionist George Fabian Weasley informs Chairman and President Frederick Gideon Weasley that he has turned his back on everything that is holy and good by engaging in —"'_

'Give me that! "_6:11 pm. Club entry-level intern Frederick Gideon Weasley throws a hissy fit when Chairman, President, and Divine Ruler George Fabian Weasley informs him that he is—"_

'"_a betrayer —"' _wrote Fred.

'"_dating a pretty girl,"' _wrote George, after snatching back the parchment and crossing out Fred's previous statement.

Fred sighed. 'Well that's true. At least it's Angelina. Still, you are never, ever, ever becoming a _Whipped Weasley. _Stay true to our values, George!'

Fred remained firm in his resolve for as long as he could, but after a few months he had no choice but to admit George. Fred tried to coax him into pulling a prank on Percy during a date with Audrey, only to be told that George was going to dinner with Angelina and, furthermore, that Fred should leave Percy alone. "The poor guy's doing his best to impress her, Freddie. He's having a hard enough time as it is."

"Since when were you one to miss out on a prank?" demanded Fred.

The shrug George gave in response told Fred all he needed to know and, with the utmost reluctance, he admitted George into the club.

Fred was nothing short of appalled by the whole affair, and when Charlie came home for a visit he wasted no time in telling him the whole thing. "You and I, Char, we're the only sane ones left. We've got to stick together now, buddy, they can't get the better of us."

He expected Charlie to swear the two of them would remain bachelors for eternity, or at the very least give a solemn nod of agreement, but instead he remained silent and still, staring intently into his butterbeer. Eventually, as though reaching a decision, he gave a short nod and rose, then downed the rest of his butterbeer and gave Fred a pat on the back. "Don't worry about it, mate," he said, before donning his cloak and disappearing out the door.

"Wait, where are you going?" asked Fred in confusion, but was answered only by a loud _crack! _as Charlie Disapparated.

That was the first of Charlie's mysterious absences, which soon became more and more frequent. Despite Fred's best efforts, however, Charlie would say little on the topic.

"So where have you been lately?" asked Fred for the thousandth time.

"Busy," replied Charlie. "Say, do you know when Dad gets off work?"

"Nice try, mate, you're not dodging the question this time. What have you been doing?"

"Nothing, I've just… George! Angelina! Hi!" Charlie practically shouted, their sudden appearance saving him from answering.

"Hey boys," said Angelina, taking a seat across from them. "Listen, I'm throwing a bit of a party at mine this Saturday, if you're interested?"

"Sounds good," said Fred. "Who all is going to be there?"

"Oh, it's not going to be anything big, just a few friends over butterbeers. You guys, Ron, Hermione, Harry, Ginny, Alicia and her new boyfriend Simon, Lee and his girlfriend whose name I forget, Katie and a couple of her teammates and maybe her friend Leanne, a couple of my coworkers… Oh, and I was thinking of inviting Oliver Wood." She giggled. "I'm trying to set him up with Katie. Don't you think they'd be adorable together? Both such Quidditch nuts."

"Just because she likes Quidditch doesn't mean she'd be any good for Oliver," said Charlie. Well, more like growled, really. Fred glanced at him in surprise, wondering why he suddenly looked so tense.

Angelina raised an eyebrow. "Well, of course it doesn't, but they have a lot more in common than that. They're both really nice, goal-oriented, attractive…"

"Yeah, yeah, okay we get it," interrupted Fred, irritated without really knowing why. All this talk of couples, presumably. He glanced at Charlie, whose scowl had deepened considerably. "Name a time, and we'll be there."

Stretched out on Angelina's sofa, Fred leaned back and surveyed the scene around him. "Reckon it's time to liven this party up, hey Georgie?" asked Fred, swiping George's firewhiskey and taking a swig.

George's eyes lit up. "You read my mind, Freddie-boy. What are you thinking? Maybe bust out some of the classics, it's been a while."

"I brought a couple canary creams, how about we…" Fred trailed off mid-sentence as Angelina came hurrying over, Katie on her arm.

"George! Fred!"

He was stunned at the sight of Katie in a dress. It had been a long time, after all, since he'd seen her, and for as long as he'd known her she'd been a bit of a tomboy. Such a little thing shouldn't make a difference and yet, somehow, he found himself looking at her as though seeing her for the first time.

"Have you seen Oliver anywhere?" asked Angelina. "I've barely seen him all night."

_Katie's soft curves and those lean, Quidditch-toned legs…_

"Nope," said George. "But hey, don't worry about it, Katie. Here, have a cream bun to make you feel better."

_Those blue, blue eyes…_

Katie raised an elegant eyebrow and Fred felt his face heating up. He was lost, couldn't speak, could do nothing but stare as her mouth formed sounds, which slowly began to take the shape of words in Fred's jumbled mind.

"Seriously, George?" she said. "I've known you for how long now?"

George sighed. "We need new targets. No one trusts us anymore."

"With good reason," laughed Angelina. "Oh, Oliver!" She waved frantically as Oliver came into view, deep in conversation with Charlie.

Katie's head snapped around and she took a couple of steps towards him. Fred felt the loss as keenly as if each step had been a thousand miles. He was empty, bereft, numb.

"Hey Oliver," purred Katie, and Oliver reluctantly drew his attention away from Charlie.

"Hi Katie," he said.

"I haven't seen you all night, and I was hoping to hear all about your latest Quidditch season! That save you made in the match against the Wimbourne Wasps was _incredible_." She rested her fingers lightly on his arm, and suddenly Fred found he wasn't empty at all. In fact, he was filled with a murderous rage and all he wanted to do was dive between the two of them and tear them apart so she wouldn't touch him anymore, she'd_ never_ touch him again. Had he taken one look at Charlie's face he would have realised that the sentiment was shared exactly, but Fred's attention was riveted on Katie.

The tension was quickly defused when Oliver took a step back, breaking the contact between him and Katie. Placing one calming hand on Charlie's shoulder he steered them both away, saying only, "I'm sorry Katie, some other time maybe."

Staring at the retreating pair, George looked stunned. "Did Oliver Wood just voluntarily turn his back on the chance to talk about Quidditch?"

Angelina could only nod, dumbstruck. "There's a development I hadn't foreseen," she murmured to herself. She stood quietly for a moment in thought then gave a short nod and, with a knowing smirk at Fred, said loudly, "Come on George, let's go say hi to Alicia and Simon."

Suddenly Fred and Katie were left _all alone. _Fred willed himself to speak. "Um, er, Katie…" He cleared his throat and tried again. "Hey, don't worry about Wood, that guy's an idiot. Er, can I get you something to drink?"

She looked at him in surprise, then smiled. "Fred Weasley, are you blushing?"

And just like that he could speak freely to her, the way he always had. "What can I say, I'm so good-looking that sometimes I even embarrass myself. Frankly, I'm surprised your head hasn't exploded from looking at me. It's like looking at the sun, you know."

Katie shook her head, laughing. "Still the same old Fred Weasley."

Fred looked at her, taking in those familiar features, that familiar laugh, like a blind man who's just discovered he's been able to see all this time. "Still the same old Katie Bell," he said, softly.

It wasn't long before Fred and Katie began dating and Charlie returned once more to Romania. Over the next couple of years, however, his visits to England became longer and more and more frequent until eventually, one evening over dinner at the Burrow, he announced his intention to remain permanently in England in order to live with Oliver. He was met by shocked silence, broken only by a crash as Ginny's glass slipped out of her hand and shattered on the floor. No one noticed.

"I don't believe this," Fred said, finally. "I always thought dragons were your true love."

"Well, eet looks like 'e 'as found somezing 'e loves more," pronounced Fleur. "Eet 'appens to everyone eventually."

Ginny grinned. "Yeah, I mean what about you Fred? You're nuts about Katie."

Fred couldn't help the smile that lit up his face at the thought of her. "She's my world," he said, softly.

George groaned. "Oh Merlin, could you be any more cheesy? You're such a sap, Fred." Then he grinned. "Knew you'd get there eventually!"

The very next evening, a meeting was called. The Weasley clan, which had greatly increased over the years, sat around the dining table while George stood in front, a familiar and by now very tattered-looking parchment in hand.

"Ladies and gentlemen," he began, solemnly. "Tonight, we welcome our final two members into the most prestigious and honourable of clubs, one that for years now has kept the flame of romance burning bright. It is now, this very night, that our sacred cause has been fulfilled, as with the entry of our final two members, the set is finally complete. Even the most hardened and bitter of hearts—"

"Oi!" said Fred.

"— must eventually succumb to the unstoppable force that is true love. A love that has withstood werewolves" he said, indicating Bill and Fleur, "distance," he continued with a nod at Charlie and Oliver, "divided loyalties," he waved his hand at Percy and Audrey, "idiocy," he smirked at Fred and Katie, "years of drama and enduring friendship," he acknowledged Ron and Hermione, "and finally, evil itself and all the struggles of war," he finished, with a bow towards Ginny and Harry.

"Mssrs Charles Mortimer Weasley and Frederick Gideon Weasley, please step forward. You are now officially _Whipped Weasleys. _I welcome you."

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**A/N: Thanks for reading! If you could please leave a review that would make me very happy! :)**


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